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“Tag Glücksbärchen,

das ist mal kitschig, aber passt in dem Fall so gut.

Was wollt ich? Genau. Wäsche waschen. Und mich nochmal für den Abend mit Dir bedanken. Er war so aufschlussreich. Und wahr. Und toll.

Wie Du erkannt hast, dass die Dinge vom einen zum anderen führen. Für uns alle und sogar für mich. Sie laufen wie von selbst, wenn wir sie lassen. Manchmal sind es schräge Dinge – was uns nur noch mehr zeigen müsste, dass wir auf dem richtigen Weg sind, wenn er nicht standardisiert ist.

Von der Theorie, aufs Unterbewusstsein zu hören und nach dem Herzen zu gehen – ich war so froh, das endlich mal wieder zu hören. Wo sonst niemand träumt hier außer mir. Und Dir. So wie das Pferd ein lang gehegter Traum von Dir ist, den Du Dir endlich erfüllst. Ich bin so froh und stolz auf Dich!

Unsere Feststellung, dass die standardisierten Konzepte uns einengen. Das empfinde ich schon lange so, aber es ist saugut, dieselben Zweifel von jemand Nahestehendem zu hören. Neulich hab ich ein Zitat in der FR von der Künstlerin Barbara Kruger gelesen: “Ich glaube an den Zweifel.” Scheint ein Anachronismus zu sein und trotzdem so wahr. Die Entwicklung liegt an uns selbst: Seit ich losgelassen habe und den Sprung gewagt, fühlt es sich endlich nach Schwimmen an und nicht nach dem verzweifelten Versuch mit dem Strom zu paddeln (und nicht unterzugehen).

Die Realität ist nunmal ein Arschloch. Und so sehr der Mensch nach seinem Sinn sucht, so wenig hat er einen. Nein, wir werden die Welt nicht retten – es sei denn natürlich, ich mache endlich meinen Superheldenkurs. Aber am wenigsten Sinn macht es, sich dewegen das einzige zu verderben, worauf wir Einfluss haben: unser Leben. Und verdammt nochmal den Spaß daran.

Ich möchte jetzt versuchen, noch stärker an die Herztheorie zu glauben. Zu vertrauen. Und wenn die Welt um mich herum zusammenkracht, mein Herz steht. Keiner kann mir das wegnehmen. Das klingt kitschig, aber wahrscheinlich braucht ein Zyniker umso mehr Illusion. Nein, Illusion ist das falsche Wort: eine Idee. Eine Ideealisierung.

Versprechen wir uns, dass wir unserem Herz folgen. Generell im Leben. Solange wir damit andere nicht verletzen: für das Herz und das Wagen.

Danke.”

Ein Brief an eine Freundin. Happy New Yeah everybody!

_________________________

“Hello Good Luck Bear,

man, that’s cheesy, but it suits so well in this case.

What was I gonna do? Right, wash the laundry. And say thanks again for the evening with you. It was so revealing. And true. And awesome.

You made me see that a lot of things lead to the other – as soon as we open up and let them. Also in my life. Sometimes it’s weird things, which should prove us even more that we’re on the right way when it’s not the ordinary.

Our theory that we should listen to the subconscious and follow our heart – I was so glad to hear that from you. As nobody else is dreaming here besides me. And you. Like the horse which has always been your dream which you now finally fulfill. I am so happy and proud of you!

Our statement, that the standardized concepts will just narrow us. I’ve thought about that for a long time but it’s damn good to hear the same doubts from a close person. I just recently read a quote in the Frankfurter Rundschau from the artist Barbara Kruger: “I believe in the doubt.” It seems to be an anachronism – yet so true. It’s up to ourselves: Since I let loose and leaped off, it finally feels like swimming and not the desperate attempt to paddle with the stream (and not drown).

To be honest, reality is a sucker. And the more we try to hunt down our meaning, the less we will find any. No, we won’t save the world – unless I finally take my Superhero lessons of course. But the most senseless act is drown in the senselessness and spoil the only matter we can influence: our life and it’s blast.

From now on I’ll try to believe in the heart theory even more. To trust. And if the world is falling apart, my heart walks upright. Man, that sounds so cheesy again, but maybe a cynical person needs a little illusion. No, illusion is the wrong word: An idea. An idealization.

Lets promise each other that we will follow our heart. Just general in life. As long as we don’t hurt anybody else: for the heart and the daring.”

A letter to a friend.

Yesterday a friend and I found some (more) opposite forces within us. On the one hand it´s the will to show what u got. And on the other hand it´s the will to: Run away as fast as you can and hide in a hole, underneath the sofa, in a blanket, behind the bushes not daring to breathe. The hat represents this condition. It is an eyecatcher and a stash at the same time.

Lena&Magda are definately torn by both forces. But actually, right now Magda and the hide-thing wins. I run, I´m off …

… BYE

What is it that everybody behaves strangely right now? People can´t concentrate, are crazy about love, couples lying all night long under the sky not caring about the outer world (and the not comfortable conditions of lying on the floor). People are actually friendly (!). They go out and party hard, walk barefoot, shop as if there was no Tomorrow, stick together with their friends. Their outfits go pretty much close to naked. And what about me? I feel as if I was in love, jittery as if I had a huge show coming up. run around totally confused, talk stupid shit, drop everything. But nothing can destroy the basic good mood. So what is wrong with us? Did they put something in the water that we have to drink in the heat? Or did we find the world conquering formula of inner peace and happiness? Hm. Well, I guess it´s just summer. Damn, we´re so ordinary.

A truckload of costumes (2 x ten plus more junk), the coolest colleague on earth, VIP passes that take you anywhere including backstage at the Centerstage, and a booking for the aftershow party at Rock am Ring.

Also helpful: A cowboy hat for the roadtrip, major chaos for having major fun, a tiny hotel in the middle of nowhere with unfriendly people who look at us, as if we were aliens, and with cows, horses, cats, monster rabbits and geese we look at, as if they were aliens, a nice and calm chaperone who sorts everything out, huge bodyguards, laid back people from suzuki, nice big and flat stages for really rocking the moves, flat dance sneakers for really rocking the stage, stagefright and stomach flip, Jägermeister, a drunk audience with cool people, bands, Rammstein (fuck, we met Rammstein!), Slash (in MY audience?), MTV-people and everybody else, old friends to bump into, hot jacuzzis inviting 17 year old rich gals to have sex, other people accidently running around naked, a mind blowing DJ-Set from Chris aka Julian Smith, and in between the two nights a marvellous day at RAR on the VIP tribune with a great view.

AND a camera to take better pictures than this crap here!

Thanks to emotions event for one of the most amazing events ever.

I am quite late with the posts. The next one will be delayed as well. One reason is that there are so many duties! For example: Right now I´m sitting in the train with a bunch of idiots (friends) on our way to a party in cologne. The guys started drinking already, the girls put make up on, I try to work …

Good night …